


What Happened Last Night?

by under_the_blue_moonlight



Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders
Genre: Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-18 22:53:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14223570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/under_the_blue_moonlight/pseuds/under_the_blue_moonlight
Summary: Parties are not Logan Evans' thing, but when his roommates host one and he's convinced to tag along, they all wake up the next morning wondering the same thing: what happened last night?





	What Happened Last Night?

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when you decide to write a Sanders Sides fanfiction based on the song Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time by Panic! At The Disco.  
> I apologise in advance.

Logan Evans was not one for parties. Spending all night socialising with people when he could be studying and preparing for exams was not how he lived. So, when all his roommates said they were going to host a party and asked him to stay as well, instead of running off to the library, his initial response was ‘no’.

Roman Prince immediately tried convincing him to come. He told him about all the booze that would be there, the plan to go bar-hopping and that he overheard someone say that they were bringing cocaine. Logan still declined.

Virgil Anderson attempted to use a different tactic, telling Logan that he needed another introvert to come so he won’t be alone in the corner, drinking and trying not to make eye contact. Still, Logan refused.

Patton Ferrier decided it was time to bring out the big guns. He got on his knees in front of Logan and gave him... the puppy dog eyes. Damn! Patton knew that Logan couldn’t say no to them. The nerd sighed before giving in.

Yes, he would stay, but he would only have one drink and he would not use any illegal substances.

Yeah, that promise to himself did not last very long.

The next morning Logan woke up in his living room, with a headache that felt like someone was whacking him around the head with a hammer, wearing nothing but his boxers. An empty champagne bottle was clutched in his hand.

‘Ugggghhh...’ he groaned, putting his hands on his forehead. ‘What happened last night?’

‘I have no fucking idea...’ Roman’s voice groaned from the other side of the room.

Logan pushed himself into a sitting position and looked to the other person in the room. Roman was led on the sofa. He wasn’t wearing his shirt, but he was still wearing his white jeans, so he was luckier than Logan. He did have a couple additions to his outfit, however. He had a party hat on his head and bedsheet tied over his shoulders like a robe. He also held a cane in his hands. And he wore a pair of high heels.

‘All I remember...’ he continued, ‘is that I was the king of that party! Ow! Shouldn’t have yelled... Loud noises hurt... ‘

Speaking of loud noises, the door of the room suddenly slammed open and Virgil’s voice yelled:

‘I WOKE UP ON THE FUCKING ROOF!’

‘Please don’t yell...’ Logan winced.

‘I passed out in the drainpipe last night! Jesus fucking Christ, what happened?!’ Virgil continued to yell. ‘Also, I think I saw some people in Joan, Talyn and Thomas’ pool, next door... Please tell me they were at the party and it wasn’t breaking and entering.’

‘Yeah, they were here...’ Roman replied. ‘Oh! I just remembered something! When we were bar-hopping, I was finding it hard to walk because of the heels, so we stole a shopping  
cart and you all pushed me around in it.’

‘Why are you wearing high heels?’ Logan asked.

‘I think... I lost a bet with someone,’ Roman replied. ‘I don’t remember exactly who, but he was wearing a chiffon skirt.’

‘Hold on...’ Virgil looked around. ‘Where’s Patton?’

‘Uh... he’s definitely not in the kitchen!’ Patton’s voice yelled from the kitchen.

The three guys in the living room shared a glance. Roman stumbled to his feet and Logan attempted to get to his, only to collapse back to the ground.

‘This is not right. I’m meant to be the responsible one. I’m a gentleman, a scholar and I do not fall when I try to stand!’ he growled as he once again attempted to get to his feet, much more successfully this time.

The three of them made their way to the kitchen and, as they entered, their eyes widened.

Patton was stood there, wearing a wedding dress.

His face flushed as he noticed the others. He flushed even more when he saw that Logan was one clothing item away from being naked.

‘What the fuck happened last night?’ Virgil repeated the question that they’d all been asking themselves the entire time.

‘Wait... you don’t think that maybe... one of us... married Patton, do you?’ Logan asked. ‘Because, I think I remember a ceremony of sorts.’

‘N-No! I, uh, probably just dressed up like this as a joke. Right?’ Patton looked between the other three.

‘Yeah... Yeah! That’s gotta be it!’ Virgil said more to himself than the others.

‘... There my pants are!’ Logan yelled out. He went over to a chair and grabbed the jeans hanging on the back of it. ‘Why do they smell like gasoline?’

‘I don’t know but, Lo, you’ve got a hickey,’ Roman pointed out.

‘What?!’ Logan turned his head, attempting to see the love bite. ‘Okay, it is official, I’m never letting you guys drag me to a party again.’

‘You think you’ve got it bad...’ Virgil grimaced as he pulled a used condom from his pocket.

‘Oh god...’ Roman gasped.

‘What is it?’ Virgil asked.

‘The reason I was crowned king of the party was because I fucked a guy and managed to sneak the condom I used into his hoodie’s pocket,’ Roman explained.

‘Oh. My. God!’ Patton gasped.

‘...Welp, I’m out,’ Virgil turned and left the room.

‘Guys! I fucked Jack Smellington!’ Roman ran his hands through his hair.

‘Well, look at it this way...’ Logan held up something he had pulled out of his jeans pocket. ‘At least you didn’t marry him, like I apparently did with Patton.’

‘Wait, WHAT?!’ Virgil ran back into the room.

The four boys stared in shock at the marriage certificate in Logan’s hand.

‘We’re married? You and me? Husbands?’ Patton questioned.

‘Yep,’ Logan nodded.

‘So, he’s the one who gave you the hickey...’ Roman nodded in realisation.

‘Wait, this means that...’ A grin appeared on Virgil’s face. ‘The ship is canon!’

‘Ship?! You ship us?!’ Logan’s eyes widened.

‘Of course!’ Roman rolled his eyes. ‘You two are so cute together! It was meant to be.’

Both Patton and Logan’s faces flushed bright red.

‘I... I’m gonna get changed!’ Patton turned and ran from the room as fast as he could in the gown.

‘I think I need to talk to him in private,’ Logan turned and followed the man in the dress through the doorway.

Roman and Virgil were left alone in the kitchen. They avoided eye contact before Roman broke the silence.

‘Okay. About what we did. If it makes you feel any better, I remember enjoying it.’

‘That does not help. At all.’

‘Didn’t think it would.’

There was an awkward silence.

‘We should probably check to see if there are any stragglers around here who haven’t gone home,’ Virgil broke it.

‘Yeah. That sounds... good.’

The two boys left the room before pausing. They shared a glance before Roman pulled Virgil into a passionate kiss.

Meanwhile, upstairs, the other two were in the same situation.

‘Being married at twenty-one isn’t that bad, right?’ Patton said as they pulled away. ‘I mean, that’s how old James and Lily were in Harry Potter, and they were soulmates!’

‘We can get a divorce, if you really want t- ‘

‘No,’ Patton cut Logan off. ‘I love you so much, Lo. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before! I was just too afraid to say it. I want to be with you forever!’

‘I want to be with you, Pat,’ Logan smiled. ‘Also, you look pretty good in that dress.’

Patton blushed. ‘And you look good without a shirt on.’

Now it was Logan’s turn to blush. ‘Maybe this night wasn’t so bad after all.’


End file.
